louvv letters

the first and last time i had ever tried my hand at writing a louvv letter was in... ummm.. class 11. no, sorry, class 12. that would be way back in 1999. fully seven years. the lady in question was this person called K.(now lets not get carried away and be all kafkaesque) nice lady, in fact. one year my junior, and rather pretty in a somewhat .. robust way. as in, the kind of fair damsel you might want by your side whilst wandering through caverns which may be inhabited by dread monsters. as, the kind of fair damsel who would rip the aforementioned dread monster from limb to limb. while yours truly, would tremble behind the nearest pillar. but, before we get ahead of ourselves, let me also tell you that this letter was written on behalf of my esteemed comrade V. in this noble task, i had the help of I, I and S. one of the Is also had a computer(back in those days when we hardly knew what computers were). so i wrote the letter. as well as i could. put in as much "substance" as possible. tried to put myself in V's shoes, as a matter of fact(no, that i didn't..).. well, yes, i wrote a whopping good louvv letter. I's computer was then used to get this letter printed out. V then arranged for someone to deliver it. i should mention at this point that V already had some history with this gurle. exactly how complicated this history was he had never let me know. in fact, it was only three years later, while at university that he did. if i had known that he had pulled the stunts that he had, i would have dissuaded him from trying to get there with mere letters. but, yes, the letter was either never read, or never understood. the first option is less painful to me. if in fact, the delivery system failed then it is not my fault that the payload misfired(something, which i believe happens routinely with antiaircraft missiles). if, on the other hand, the girl read the letter and then proceeded to give V the boot the way she did(yes), then, that does cast some aspersions on my skills as a letter writer. i will grant you that i am no romatic poet, but i do remember not having put a single equation in it. gaah! some people just do not understand three syllable words.